Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
spayne

Funny!

Recommended Posts

And God populated the Earth with broccoli and cauliflower and spinach and green and yellow vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.

 

And Satan created McDonald's. And McDonald's brought forth the 99-cent double cheeseburger.

 

And Satan said to Man "You want fries with that?" And Man said, "Super size them". And Man gained pounds.

 

And God created the healthful yogurt, that woman might keep her figure that Man found so fair.

 

And Satan froze the yogurt, and he brought forth chocolate, nuts and brightly colored sprinkle candy to put on the yogurt. And woman gained pounds.

 

And God said "Try my crispy fresh salad."

 

And Satan brought forth creamy dressings, bacon bits and shredded cheese.

 

And there was ice cream for dessert. And Woman gained pounds.

 

And God said "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil with which to cook them."

 

And Satan brought forth chicken-fried steak from Cracker Barrel so big it needed its own platter. And Man gained pounds, and his bad cholesterol went through the roof.

 

And God brought forth running shoes, and Man resolved to lose those extra pounds.

 

And Satan brought forth cable TV with remote control so Man would not have to toil to change channels between ESPN and ESPN2. And Man gained pounds.

 

And God said "You are running up the score, Devil." And God brought forth the potato, a vegetable naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition.

 

And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them. And he created sour cream dip also. And Man clutched his remote control and ate the potato chips swaddled in cholesterol. And Satan saw and said "It is good."

 

And Man went into cardiac arrest.

 

And God sighed and created quadruple by-pass surgery...

 

And Satan created HMOs...

I read this on another message board! I know... oh, the horror! I go to other message boards! It was appropriate for me as I'm trying to lose a bit of the table muscle. (Bow)

 

Stacy

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

(clap) too funny

I've already printed a copy of that(to give to the Pastor at our Church who just had by-pass surgery), and now getting ready to e-mail it to friends!:D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
(clap) too funny

I've already printed a copy of that(to give to the Pastor at our Church who just had by-pass surgery), and now getting ready to e-mail it to friends!:D

Right on! Glad he enjoyed it... and wish him well for me! By-pass surgery! Oy!

 

Stacy

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  

×