Emerald525 Posted May 5, 2011 Share Posted May 5, 2011 So, I've been thinking about this and just was curious what people's opinion is on the matter of fish flakes. You know who you are(nono)! You know who they are!DOH!Pretty much anyone who has sold anything has dealt with them. (nutty) This is not directed at any one person and I don't have any one in mind in particular right now so don't go thinking "oh no she's talking about me (scary)" because I'm not. Several people I have recently bought things from have all had this happen.DOH! So I have just been thinking about it more. Trust me, I will let you know if I'm not happy with you but some are less confrontational than myself! I just want to know why people do this. You know the scenario. You post up something for sale and somebody chimes in. I want that! I want that!(clap)(clap) pm sent! I've been there. We are all impulsive people. I'm worse in the middle of the night. Then I'm like [language filter] why did I say I wanted that?(nutty)(laugh) So then you're afraid to back out of the deal.(scary).. and don't call or answer pms or simply don't show up DOH!. That is far worse than just saying. Hey, I changed my mind. I don't want your bubblegum monster mash alien eye acrochalicemonti. Several people I have recently bought things from have all had this happen.DOH! This is incredibly rude and disrespectful. First of all you have just wasted the person's time and essentially have taken money out of their pocket because they could have sold it to person B but they were kind enough to hold it for you. For me the biggest issue is wasting my time. Believe it or not I do have a life outside of this forum(laugh) and my life work is not for me to wait for you to message me so I can drop everything or wait around and have you not show up. I just want to know what other people think about this. Is it a big deal to you? Does it irritate the heck out of you like it does me?(flame) Are people asking for it for not asking for payment first when they hold an item? Inquiring minds want to know!(scratch) If you happen to be a fish flake and are not afraid to admit it, why do you do this? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lowman Posted May 5, 2011 Share Posted May 5, 2011 I recently flaked on a deal with a long-time member.I didn't mean to, but I have been working like 16 of the last 17 days, 12 to 13 hours a day. and I forgot. Then to make matters worse, I would leave work and go straight home and then crash in front of the tv without giving it a second thought. No excuse, just worn out. I feel terrible about it and now my kharma is paying me back on it. I have had a couple of people back out on the tank I am selling. I did offer to send a paypal though. I have learned a lesson from mysel fand from being flaked on, money talks and bull**** walks. To the person I flaked on, you know who you are, if you still have all the stuff we talked about, I will still buy it. My schedule has changed back to my regular hours for now. I hope that this hasn't endangered our friendship.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
impur Posted May 5, 2011 Share Posted May 5, 2011 I've had it go so far as making plans and had the people just not show up. I drove up to portland to fly out on vacation, made all the arrangements, confirmed them the night before, then got up there and they both left me standing around with a cooler full of corals and nowhere to put them. Luckily Kris worked close to the airport so i was able to drop the cooler off at her work, but i guess i left it at the wrong door or someone moved it, and they sat there 2 days. All lived though thank goodness, i feel so bad when i lose corals I just can't believe someone would bail on me knowing full well those corals would die as a result of their actions. I keep track of the people that flake and won't sell or buy from them. Its not a game, these are live animals that have no control over what is happening to them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarkBirkett Posted May 5, 2011 Share Posted May 5, 2011 This posting is all my fault. I'll take the blame. I thought it was like Craigslist here and you just had to take it. I think the forum section should have a feedback system that would show how many transactions went good or bad. I think too many bad transactions gets you suspended from the forum and a lot of good transactions get your item sold quickly with confidence from the buyer. Just my opinion and isn't worth squat if nobody reads it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chewie Posted May 5, 2011 Share Posted May 5, 2011 I think Bob put it best. Money talks, BS walks! You ought to hear Scotts thoughts on this.... LOL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarkBirkett Posted May 5, 2011 Share Posted May 5, 2011 Hey Kim do you still want that Rubbermade? Ha Ha Ha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emerald525 Posted May 5, 2011 Author Share Posted May 5, 2011 No Mark it was not your fault I started this thread yes I do still want the Rubbermaid (laugh) . Lowman thanks for chiming in too. It takes courage to admit hey I did this and the rationale why and no I was not referring to you either. Like I said I was not thinking of one person in particular. It's just something that really really bothers me. It's one thing to back out of a deal and I can understand that but far different to say hey I'm going to get it hold it for me for several weeks and then never show up. Miles your situation goes above and beyond irresponsible. I would have posted that person's name on the forum in the feedback section. I am not as polite as some. I will let people know someone is a flake so that other people don't have to deal with it and don't have the same negative experience I have. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarkBirkett Posted May 5, 2011 Share Posted May 5, 2011 What about the feedback for forum users so potential buyers have a gauge on the seller. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emerald525 Posted May 5, 2011 Author Share Posted May 5, 2011 I know the board had talked about having an Itrader type feedback section. They wanted to wait until all the bugs were out of the new upload but I have heard nothing more. I like the idea of itrader like they have on reef2reef. There's no drama it's between the buyer and seller and it holds people accountable. Otherwise you might as well sell on craigslist. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lowman Posted May 5, 2011 Share Posted May 5, 2011 I sold a well respected member a pretty expensive chalice a couple of years ago, I let this person put 50% down and give me payments on the rest. That person still, after 2 years hasn't finished paying it back. I have quit asking for it. The trouble is, I would probably let most other well respected members here do the same thing.It's not about the money any more for me, it's the principle....... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mohaynow Posted May 5, 2011 Share Posted May 5, 2011 That is one reason I HATE dealing with craigslist. Another one of my pet peeves is when you reply to a WTB ad and after a little back and forth, the wtb'r drops off the face of the earth. Some times a simple "No thankyou" is much appreciated Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emerald525 Posted May 5, 2011 Author Share Posted May 5, 2011 I sold a well respected member a pretty expensive chalice a couple of years ago' date=' I let this person put 50% down and give me payments on the rest. That person still, after 2 years hasn't finished paying it back. I have quit asking for it. The trouble is, I would probably let most other well respected members here do the same thing.It's not about the money any more for me, it's the principle.......[/quote'] It is never about the money for me. It is always about the principle and the complete lack of respect for my time and lack of responsibility. If you're going to say you're going to be there then be there. If you can't make it then call.If you change your mind then let the person know. If you don't pay up and don't show up, I will let people know about it. If you forget I will remind you but I am not your mother and you're not a child so don't act like one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael7979 Posted May 5, 2011 Share Posted May 5, 2011 I sold a well respected member a pretty expensive chalice a couple of years ago' date=' I let this person put 50% down and give me payments on the rest. That person still, after 2 years hasn't finished paying it back. I have quit asking for it. [/quote'] FINE BOB!!!! I'll pay you the rest!! What's the balance again??? :) :) :) I all honesty if everyone would just be a little more thoughtful, none of this would be a problem. Communication is KEY!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
impur Posted May 5, 2011 Share Posted May 5, 2011 I did put up a feedback thread, it was before this site was updated and probably gone now. I don't think either person posts here anymore either. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NoobtoSalt Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 I have had many flakes over the past year including myself on one occasion. I delt with it with the person as I felt horrible about it. My issue was last year I was trying to sell a blue hippo tang and the person said they wanted it and setup a date and then fell off the face of the earth for a couple of weeks. I held it for them for quite sometime and luckily found a new buyer but it bothered me at the time to see that they were not responding to my pm's as well as making posts on other for sale threads saying that they wanted to buy stuff from others. I have yet to meet this person but I don't plan on doing any dealings with them due to this. I did talk to other members about this person and they have had similar dealings with them as well. Either way if your trying to sell stuff I chalk it up as it could always happen. On larger purchase I now ask for paypal to hold it for them. If I have delt with you before and know that it's not an issue than I don't worry about any prepayment. Just my two cents. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bace Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 I've not had too much experience selling stuff here but everyone I've dealt with has been great. If they have backed out of the sale I've gotten reasons why and when I've set up to meet people they have always shown up. I may just be lucky I suppose but I really appreciate that everyone has been so dependable. I've done my best to follow through with everything I've bought. I've had dealing with a few of you now and as far as I know I've done good on my end. If not by all means let me know If ever I was stuck with a cooler full of coral like that I'd be making a few angry calls lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emerald525 Posted May 6, 2011 Author Share Posted May 6, 2011 I'm curious to know why people flake.(scratch) Life gets busy and things happen but c'mon really we're talking a simple phone call. I can understand sometimes life getting busy and forgetting or plans changing and not being able to meet. It's more the flat out not showing up. Not saying anything. Not returning the pms or messages. When Beth first signed up to this forum she tried to sell some things and had people say they were going to meet and we would wait and just didn't show up at all.DOH! To be honest , that's why I didn't sign up to this forum right away. I was thinking what kind of people were on here LOL. Mistakes happen I understand that but like Michael said communication would be very much appreciated. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lowman Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 I know in my case I am Passive/Aggressive. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MVPaquatics Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 Yeah I have had similar issues...someone immediately wants it...then I go to setup a time or get money and then the PMs take forever...someone even said they couldn't afford it anymore due to losing a job, and then I see them on here still being the first to respond to many things for sale...whats $20 when you are looking at things for $200+? Just be honest...if you don't have cash in hand and aren't available until 2 sundays from next, dont call dibs, instead see if it's still for sale 2 sundays from now, I am sure if the seller wanted their money a few weeks from now, that is when they would sell it. hahaha Too bad the site couldn't act as an intermediary like paypal to take payments and such...you could see scores and feedbacks for buyers/sellers, and the site could get the fees...pay for it when you see/want it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KMiller Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 I use another forum that uses Itrader (not a fish forum, but a Gymboree clothing forum.. (laugh) for the kiddos) and I LOVE IT!!!! Works great, Ebay style with feedback and everything... it's a really great idea if we could incorporate it to this forum!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ninkylou Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 Funny that this topic came up when it did. I have issues with this and it goes farther reaching than sales and stuff like that. It is the sense that some people feel they are entitled to walk all over other people to meet their own needs. I told my daughter, who is planning to study psychology that I wanted her to study why sopme people have this over-inflated sense of entitlement, that what can do whatever they feel like without caring about how it impacts other people. Here is her response. "When babies are born the only thing they are cognicent of is that THEY exist. Some people never get past that" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
racefan Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 Funny that this topic came up when it did. I have issues with this and it goes farther reaching than sales and stuff like that. It is the sense that some people feel they are entitled to walk all over other people to meet their own needs. I told my daughter' date=' who is planning to study psychology that I wanted her to study why sopme people have this over-inflated sense of entitlement, that what can do whatever they feel like without caring about how it impacts other people. [b']Here is her response. "When babies are born the only thing they are cognicent of is that THEY exist. Some people never get past that"[/b] Man that is sooo true! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DennisW Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 I think with some people, they say they will buy something then...their spouse says NO!!!! Not that I would have any experience with that...just sayin'.(wife)(scary) I've had people flake out on me but not too many. It sucks but I try not to take it personally. I really dislike taking any "down payment" on things like thru PayPal. I feel like there's more responsibility on my part. I hate being responsible. Dennis Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emerald525 Posted May 6, 2011 Author Share Posted May 6, 2011 Funny that this topic came up when it did. I have issues with this and it goes farther reaching than sales and stuff like that. It is the sense that some people feel they are entitled to walk all over other people to meet their own needs. I told my daughter' date=' who is planning to study psychology that I wanted her to study why sopme people have this over-inflated sense of entitlement, that what can do whatever they feel like without caring about how it impacts other people. Here is her response. "When babies are born the only thing they are cognicent of is that THEY exist. Some people never get past that"[/quote'] That's so true LOL! I think with some people, they say they will buy something then...their spouse says NO!!!! Not that I would have any experience with that...just sayin'.(wife)(scary) I've had people flake out on me but not too many. It sucks but I try not to take it personally. I really dislike taking any "down payment" on things like thru PayPal. I feel like there's more responsibility on my part. I hate being responsible. Dennis LOL. I can understand when the wife says no but that's not what I'm talking about. That's easy you just message back and say hey sorry I can't get that. I have no problem with that. I don't take people flaking personally. I simply hate to have my time wasted and I don't understand why people would do that in this forum. It's one thing on craigslist you never see the person again but here you get to know the people. It just doesn't make sense. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
reefnjunkie Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 Kim people are people and some are just flakes-(laugh) You must be ahead in the polls-(scratch) J/K-(whistle) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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